The Distant Hours by Kate Morton

ISBN:   9781439152782

Grade: F

I would love for someone, anyone, to explain the Kate Morton appeal to me...pretty please.  After finishing this behemoth of a book, I think I deserve some sort of prize.  The ARC clocks in at just under 700 pages.  Had I been in a bookstore purchasing this book, if it were not available in hardcover I don't think I'd buy a paperback of such heft.  As much as I dislike e-readers, in the case of The Distant Hours an e-book would have been a blessing.

I wanted to like this book, really I did.  With a character named Juniper, what's not to like right?  Wrong.  The highlight of the book was the prologue which was a fictitious story about a Mud Man.  The rest of the book was a chore to read.  It's hard to review this book without spoiling everything, so I'll keep the details sparse should any of you choose to read this book (against my better judgment).

My first hint should have been seeing a woman at my car dealership reading a different Morton title, The Forgotten Garden and falling asleep numerous times.  Not just nodding off either, full blown snoring sleeping.  Morton's books all are quite lengthy the shortest being 600 pages and all their covers are alike, a pretty picture with pretty colors of a garden, a castle or some sort of landscape scene.  A bit formulaic in my opinion, but it works as there are nothing but glowing reviews of this latest book (except mine). 

The storyline is during WWII children in London were evacuated due to bombing (I had to google what that was all about).  A woman is picked up by an eccentric woman named Juniper and taken to live at her castle with her 2 twin sisters.  Juniper writes a letter to the woman which gets lost in time and delivered 50 years later.  This woman's adult child Edie has her curiosity peaked when her mother has an emotional reaction to receiving said letter.  Naturally fate would have it so that Edie literally runs into the castle when she gets lost in the country.  She meets up with a local at a bookstore who tells her about the castle and its history and says they give tours.  Edie takes a tour and meets the 3 aging spinsters with equally unique names, Persephone (Percy), Seraphina (Saffy) and Juniper.  This is about the time when I started groaning while turning each page.  It reads like architecture porn.  The pacing was so slow that by the time anything of any interest happened, my interest had long since faded. 

By the end of the book, I just didn't care about any of the characters or the castle.  I just wanted to book to end so that I could review it and forget about reading it.  The Distant Hours felt sloppy and hurried, and also unnecessarily long and wordy. 

Would I recommend this...only if the idea of reading 700 pages or architecture porn gets you excited and you don't mind reading something with such slow pacing.  Would I read another Kate Morton novel...no freakin' way, not even if Dwight Schrute read it to me.